The search for sanity

*pokes Google, twitches at Bing*

It's not often that you search for software on the Internet, and discover that there's nothing that does what you want. With the vast amount of free and open source software up for grabs, it almost feels as if all bases have been covered. Sometimes, however, you find yourself trawling though the dark depths of search engine results, until the page numbers became mere blurs, and hitting the 'next' link becomes an autonomous reflex. Along the way, many promising results prove to be nothing more than shareware sites attempting to entice you with irrelevant software. Others, which show some glimmer of hope, have UIs that you can only imagine being designed by the local primary school kindergarten class during pastel fun time.

Arts and crafts aside, you quickly become aware of the restrictions of the software, to the extent where any valuable output is held ransom by pop-ups requesting that you purchase the 'full' version - and that's before you've even figured out if the thing does what you want!

After years of using search engines to do your bidding, you start to notice clues scattered amongst the search results. These clues are are great for predicting the likelihood of getting what you want. For instance, you know you're not going to get anywhere once you've seen warez4U-ktnxbai.com as one of the top search results. You also know that clicking said links will get you more than you bargained for, usually in the form of advertisement overload, a metric tonne of new virus friends, and a sprinkle of new spyware to keep you occupied.

One particular irritation that drives me absolutely insane is when searching for a particular product model. Perhaps it's a review I want, or a detailed list of specifications. What you get instead is a massive list of online stores with highly generalised specifications, and non-existent user reviews. Then, if you're lucky, the vendors website will be waiting for you on page 5 somewhere. Fortunately this isn't a common occurrence for major vendors. On the other hand, there's the alternate option of using the search facility on the vendor homepage, and remembering how inhumanely useless they tend to be.

But perhaps the most annoying of all is the flood of software directories which like to muddy the otherwise semi-clean waters of your search results. Not all of them, mind you, but the ones that offer nothing but crapware. Not just any crapware either, it's usually a list of crapware. Once you've scrolled through the massive page in search of something related to your original search query, you get to the keyword finale - a massive bunch of out-of-place words with high emphasis on 'free' and 'download' - and you know you've been duped.

It would be rather nice if the major search engines allowed you to implement custom search filters, in order to remove domains that are known to contain rubbish. And if such a service does exist, either natively or via a third party, I'd love to hear about it! :)